Common Questions & Answers

 

Is this forever?

No. This will not last forever, although it may feel like you will never feel like yourself again. There are things you can do to help. Try attending a support group. Hearing from other women just like you can help you feel less alone and more hopeful. Reaching out to speak to a therapist can be very helpful in getting you better. Check out How to Access Care How to Access Care to learn more about how to find a therapist. Try to be gentle with yourself. You are doing your best and it will take time. Let others know that you need their support and care right now, and that you aren’t feeling your best. You can share this page with your family and friends to help them learn how to best support you right now..

Did I cause this?

You are not to blame for having a maternal mental health complication. They are the most common complications of having a baby. Many women are surprised to learn that they had many risk factors. To learn more about risk factors you can click here.

I’m pregnant. I thought you had to be postpartum to get postpartum depression. 

A maternal mental health complication can happen at any time during pregnancy and up to one-year postpartum.

 

I feel like I am not cut out for this.

Many people think that maternal instinct is real, that women are supposed to know what to do the day they have a baby. The truth is, maternal instinct is actually something we learn with time. Many women feel uncertain becoming a mother. It takes time, but you will find your way. 


Do I need to take medicine?

It depends on you. There are several ways to treat maternal mental health complications like anxiety and depression.  Some women can boost their social support to feel better, while others find therapy helpful. Some women may do a combination of medicine, therapy, and social support.  There is no one-size-fits-all. It depends on you and what your providers decide is best for you.


 

What is the difference between a psychologist and a psychiatrist?

A psychologist is someone who will provide therapy. A psychiatrist is a medical doctor who provides therapy and prescribes medication for a mental health disorder.

I didn’t fall in love with my baby at first sight. Will it ever happen?

Many women experience this. The love will come. It just takes time and it’s completely normal, and more common than you think.


 

 

How long do I need to see a therapist?

This really depends on you and what your unique needs are. Some women only need a couple of sessions, while others may need more time if they have trauma from their past.

I thought my partner and I would get closer, but now we are fighting and further apart. Is this normal?

So many women think that having a baby will make their relationship stronger only to find the tension rises once the baby comes. Lack of sleep and the changes in roles and responsibilities can be very stressful in relationships. Many women recommend the free Gottman Deck Card App. Couples therapy can be very helpful, and asking specifically for what you both need from each other is important. Sometimes we expect the other person to know exactly what we need, but that’s really hard to know. Being able to say, “Can you wash the dishes while I take the baby?” or “Can you take the baby for a walk while I take a shower?” is easier than having the other person guess at what you need.

But I don’t feel depressed.

Depression is just one symptom, many women feel other symptoms like anxiety, panic, and anger. You can learn more about what a maternal mental health complication can look like here.



I am so angry all the time and that’s not me.

This is a very common symptom for women and one that isn’t talked about very much. Working with a therapist can be very helpful. Also, check out these tips here.

 

What can I do besides take medicine?

If you don’t feel comfortable taking medicine there are several other ways to help treat these complications. Therapy is one of the best ways to feel better. Attending support groups with other women who are feeling similar can also be very healing. Meditation has shown to decrease symptoms of anxiety and depression in new moms. Check out this list for helpful hints on what to do if you don’t want to take medicine.  Here

My family is not supportive. Should I tell them I’m having a hard time?

If you feel like your family and friends will not be supportive you don’t have to share how you are feeling with them. If you want some help on how to talk with them or information to share, we’ve created a page just for them. It lets them know how they can help support you. Simply copy and send this link
www.getmammha.com/for-your-partner-and-loved-ones to share with whomever you feel most comfortable.

I’m afraid to be alone with my baby. Is this normal? 

This is normal for women who are experiencing a maternal mental health complication. Talk therapy is very helpful if you are feeling this way. Asking for friends and family to stay with you is also very helpful while you find your footing.

I don’t like groups. Should I still go to a support group?

Many online groups are a great option. You do not have to share your camera and are allowed to just listen. Attending support groups really helps women feel better, as they feel less alone. You can find support groups going on here.

If I stop breastfeeding my baby I’m a terrible mother?

Fed is best. Whatever way you decide to feed your baby is the best way.

If you are in crisis or you think you may have an emergency, call your doctor or 911 immediately. If you're having suicidal thoughts, call 988 to talk to a skilled, trained counselor at a crisis center in your area at any time (National Suicide Prevention Lifeline).